Singspeakgloryseek’s Blog

   Have you ever been rejected by someone you really love?  They hurt you really bad.  You have a scar on your heart that will be forever engraved there.  In fact the whole thing changed you, changed you forever.

   I did that to a person once.  A very close friend.  I rejected her completely.  I know I hurt her deeply.  Several years passed, and our paths met again.  Jesus had changed me and I was less of a self-centered and narcisstic person by then (this has been an ongoing process, Jesus is still working on that in me!).    I apologized to her for my past behavior and she accepted my apology.  She forgave me.  I expected her to be properly polite to me, but never dreamed she would ever want me as a friend again.  But that is what has happened.  She has not only forgiven me, but she seems to want to have a relationship with me.

   I realize that’s what our salvation is all about.  I fear the majority of us don’t have a clue as to what we’ve been saved ‘from’.  We don’t really understand that we are born in sin, we live in sin, we are sin.  We are like the fish that doesn’t ‘know’ it’s in water, it’s just IN water, and that’s all it knows.  All of us are in the same boat – from the worst of sinner to the devoted, church-going, praying person – we are all in the same boat without Jesus.  Only Jesus can remove the punishment that is due to us.  That wrath of God.  We don’t like to hear about it, or think about it.  But it is such a wonderful thing that our God is just and fair.  He is good and perfect in everything He does.  And if I stand before Him and I have not been washed clean by Jesus, then I would not be able to argue with Him when He sentenced me to eternal damnation.  It would be the only thing He could do.  He can’t be anything else but just.

   But He WANTS to be with me, and me with Him.  That just amazes me.  So He provided the way through Jesus.  I’m forgiven.  Abba Father says, “Sue, your sin is forgiven.”   Because of Jesus.  Thank you Jesus.  But God doesn’t stop there.  Just like that friend above, God not only forgives, but He forgets.  He forgets because all He can see now is His Son, Jesus.  Thank you Jesus.  Micah 7 proclaims: 

¹⁸ Who is a God like you,
       who pardons sin and forgives the transgression
       of the remnant of his inheritance?
       You do not stay angry forever
       but delight to show mercy.

 ¹⁹ You will again have compassion on us;
       you will tread our sins underfoot
       and hurl all our iniquities into the depths of the sea.

   What a reason to rejoice!!!  We are forgiven!   Our sins are forgotton! 

   But God doesn’t stop there.  We are flourishing.  He blesses us.  He guides us, teaches us, loves us, never leaves us.  Oh my!  On and on and on we can go!  And look at this!!!!!! -  “I will make an everlasting covenant with them that I will not turn away from them, to do them good; and I will put the fear of Me in their hearts so that they will not turn away from Me.”  Jeremiah 32:40 This is a promise from our God, dear brothers and sisters.  HE has made this covenant with us.  When we have been converted and regenerated by the Holy Spirit, we have this assurance.  God will NEVER stop doing good to us!  And God will place His fear in our hearts so that we will not turn away from Him!  We will not WANT to turn away from Him, as we fear Him more and more.  ‘fear’ = knowing Him, in awe of Him, understanding His great power and majesty and goodness.

   I’m speechless.  Thank you Jesus.

   I’ve heard it preached about alot.  The Great Commission:  “Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you.”  Matthew 28:16  It’s preached to us that these are our marching orders from Jesus.  That THIS is what we’re supposed to be doing with our life.  I don’t disagree with that. 

   But I was wondering?  As I look back, it looks like Jesus is giving that command to His disciples.  I’m wondering if Christians are trying to do the great commission, but they’re not really ‘disciples’ yet.  It would be like someone trying to teach advanced math, but they’ve never been to school themselves.  Or a person practicing medicine who never went to medical school.   Remember, it took those guys Jesus called THREE years of being with Him 24/7 …. and they still really struggled.   Jesus gave us the job description for being a disciple:  He said we must be willing to give up our family, friends, even our own life.  He said we must take up our cross DAILY and follow Him.  DAILY.  Not just on Sunday’s.  I wonder, really, how many of us are REALLY disciples?  We want to be, we profess to be….. but are we, really?  Where do our devotions lie?

   Just something to think about.

   Wow.  It’s been awhile.   A long while.  Since I blogged. 

   But I have to write this down.  It’s too important to not write it down.  Something very important.  A true story.

   I was 10 years old when I decided I wanted a rabbit.  It just came to me suddenly – I wanted a rabbit.  So I went to my Mom and told her.  She said no.  I asked her again.  She said no again.  I asked her again.  She usually gave in by the 3rd or 4th time I asked.  But this time she was adament.  She would not relent.  Her answer was no.  I had never seen her so determined to stick to her guns.  This was serious!  I was bound and determined I would have that rabbit!  So I started on the whining.  That didn’t work.  I got angry and threw a tantrum.  That didn’t work.  Now I really had to kick it in.  I started in on the tears.  THAT didn’t work!!!!  I couldn’t believe it!  I’d NEVER seen my Mom so determined.  I kept at it.  The tears came and came and came and came.  I didn’t give in.  Two hours later, I had made myself physically sick from crying and sobbing and begging.

   Guess what?  She gave in.  She let me get a rabbit.  I had won. 

   Within a week I was tired of the rabbit.  I stopped feeding it, playing with it, and even caring about it.  I don’t know what ever happened to that rabbit. 

   Crazy…… that I would think of that story.  But I did.  Yesterday morning.  When I was spending time with the Lord.  I was, again, asking Him for something.  I want Him to let me spends my days with Him.  I don’t want to have to go to work.  I don’t want to have to deal with housecleaning, and bills and the things of life.  I want to work for Him fulltime.  Some kind of ministry.  I don’t know what.  There doesn’t seem to be much opportunity around here in this small South Dakota town.  But He’s God.  Anything is possible with Him.  He can make it happen.

   So I was whining to God.  I was starting in on the tears.  That’s when He reminded me of the rabbit. 

   I wonder if He’s trying to tell me something.  Do you think if He gave me what I wanted, I would tire of it after while?  Maybe, just like that little girl who didn’t have the maturity to care for a rabbit – maybe  I don’t have the maturity to care for one of His ministries.  Maybe if, as a little girl, I would have been obedient to my Mom, and submitted, and then spent my time studying about rabbits, learning about what it entails, maybe things would have turned out different.  I’m thinking that, she, knowing how much I wanted a rabbit, that as soon as she thought I was ready, she would have given me that rabbit.

   Maybe I need to really understand what it means to be called to the ministry.  Maybe if instead of whining and crying, maybe if I looked at the lives of other men and women that have given their lives to Christ….. maybe if I quietly waited on God, patiently trusting Him, maybe…….

No, not maybe!  Yes!  He would delight in giving me the desire of my heart when He thinks – when He knows – I am ready.  Because that’s one of His promises!